Either the rapture came, all the good people are gone, but there were so few that no one noticed, or this sign is true..
Monday, May 23, 2011
Monday, March 28, 2011
Expectations
The title pastor, like that of husband or wife, is a term that is pregnant with expectation.
People who under normal circumstances would say you are doing a fine job become suddenly more critical when you are attached with that title. I'm thinking of the statistic that says living together before marriage makes your marriage more likely to fail. You would think by practicing that you'd be ready, but it's not the case. You just expect things from some one you call a husband or wife that you don't expect from some one you call boyfriend or girlfriend.
I stepped down from a position at a church yesterday to pursue an opportunity with a different church. But leaving a church isn't like leaving a regular job, at least not with us Pentecostals. People project their hopes and dreams onto you. You're the one who's going to grow the church, to make things right, to bring their lost children and spouses home. But you can't always do that. I especially wasn't able to do that here, where I was given responsibility, but not allowed to make any real changes. Things I know I could do I wasn't allowed to do, and yet still, every one saw me as the great hope for the church.
We cheat ourselves when we expect to accomplish great things, but then handicap ourselves by not allowing the Lord authority in our lives. If we hold things back from Him, then we shouldn't be surprised when he doesn't use us to change the world. We've got to come clean, put all our chips on the table and all our eggs in his basket. Otherwise we're just being dishonest, we don't really want to be world-changers. We want steady income and what measure of luxury we can afford.
And if there's one thing I can't stand it's dishonesty. I'd prefer a straight fight to a bunch of sneaking around. So let's gas up the car and go, because this is the year of hope.
And Hope does not disappoint.
People who under normal circumstances would say you are doing a fine job become suddenly more critical when you are attached with that title. I'm thinking of the statistic that says living together before marriage makes your marriage more likely to fail. You would think by practicing that you'd be ready, but it's not the case. You just expect things from some one you call a husband or wife that you don't expect from some one you call boyfriend or girlfriend.
I stepped down from a position at a church yesterday to pursue an opportunity with a different church. But leaving a church isn't like leaving a regular job, at least not with us Pentecostals. People project their hopes and dreams onto you. You're the one who's going to grow the church, to make things right, to bring their lost children and spouses home. But you can't always do that. I especially wasn't able to do that here, where I was given responsibility, but not allowed to make any real changes. Things I know I could do I wasn't allowed to do, and yet still, every one saw me as the great hope for the church.
We cheat ourselves when we expect to accomplish great things, but then handicap ourselves by not allowing the Lord authority in our lives. If we hold things back from Him, then we shouldn't be surprised when he doesn't use us to change the world. We've got to come clean, put all our chips on the table and all our eggs in his basket. Otherwise we're just being dishonest, we don't really want to be world-changers. We want steady income and what measure of luxury we can afford.
And if there's one thing I can't stand it's dishonesty. I'd prefer a straight fight to a bunch of sneaking around. So let's gas up the car and go, because this is the year of hope.
And Hope does not disappoint.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Speaking of Time...
Doesn't it seem like we've been here before? Maybe it's because we have.
I like to take the "those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it" thought to a very personal level, knowing that I am going to have to face the same giants until I find the right stone to fell them.
I used to fantasize as a child about being able to go back in time and warn my then self about decisions I was about to make, to try and steer myself away from trouble. As a child I made a lot of bad decisions. But if I could go back and talk to him, I don't think I could change those decisions. I was who I was then, and didn't know how to make better decisions that the ones I made. I was busy failing the same tests, moving my way through the wheel-within-a-wheel.
The wheel withing a wheel - the part of our lives where the Lord leads us to a situation, as with Job, where we struggle with the same issue, the same character flaw until we learn to move past it. For Job, he had to get past his pride. He was so busy telling God and his friends that he never sinned that he didn't realize it wasn't about sin. It was about love, that the God who leashed the leviathan was the same God who spoke face-to-face with Job.
I'll settle with Spirit-to-spirit.
I feel like I'm moving to a new wheel this week, moving past mistakes I've been making for a long time. I'm having new dreams. Having real grown-up plans come into view. But nothing new comes without something old leaving, so growth is always the bitter parting of friends mixed with the adventure of new lands. The one going off to new adventure feels the excitement, the ones left behind feel the sting.
I might start rambling at this point, so I'll let you go. Be at peace, my friend.
I like to take the "those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it" thought to a very personal level, knowing that I am going to have to face the same giants until I find the right stone to fell them.
I used to fantasize as a child about being able to go back in time and warn my then self about decisions I was about to make, to try and steer myself away from trouble. As a child I made a lot of bad decisions. But if I could go back and talk to him, I don't think I could change those decisions. I was who I was then, and didn't know how to make better decisions that the ones I made. I was busy failing the same tests, moving my way through the wheel-within-a-wheel.
The wheel withing a wheel - the part of our lives where the Lord leads us to a situation, as with Job, where we struggle with the same issue, the same character flaw until we learn to move past it. For Job, he had to get past his pride. He was so busy telling God and his friends that he never sinned that he didn't realize it wasn't about sin. It was about love, that the God who leashed the leviathan was the same God who spoke face-to-face with Job.
I'll settle with Spirit-to-spirit.
I feel like I'm moving to a new wheel this week, moving past mistakes I've been making for a long time. I'm having new dreams. Having real grown-up plans come into view. But nothing new comes without something old leaving, so growth is always the bitter parting of friends mixed with the adventure of new lands. The one going off to new adventure feels the excitement, the ones left behind feel the sting.
I might start rambling at this point, so I'll let you go. Be at peace, my friend.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Never Enough Time
When I was a teenager a firecracker exploded in my hand. It wasn't big enough to do permanent damage, but I'll always remember the experience. For about 3 minutes the entire world turned into a searing pain in my hand and a loud ringing in my ears. There was nothing I could do but wait for the water to cool the burn and for my hearing to slowly return.
Sin is like that.
It's more like that the more you're trying to hear from the Lord. It doesn't separate you from God's grace as much as it deafens you to his voice. The world just turns to pain and ringing, and there is no cure for the effects of sin.
The reality is Christ has already forgiven you for it, if you'll accept. But the effect, the hurt, the shutting up of the soul into a castle of selfishness, that doesn't always just go away. Ask a minister who's been caught in a public embarrassment. God forgives him, but the look in his wifes eyes, the way the church shuns him, that's still there.
Jimmy Swaggart has his own radio show again, not as big, but it's there.
Time was created for healing. There are certain wounds that only time can heal. And there is no wound that won't eventually be healed, either here or in the world to come. It's just a matter of time. Time for the ringing to die down, for the wound to cool. There are no shortcuts or magic elixirs for wounds of the heart, there is only time. No one can wound you forever (except, ironically, God) and sometimes nothing will make you feel any better.
Except Time.
Sin is like that.
It's more like that the more you're trying to hear from the Lord. It doesn't separate you from God's grace as much as it deafens you to his voice. The world just turns to pain and ringing, and there is no cure for the effects of sin.
The reality is Christ has already forgiven you for it, if you'll accept. But the effect, the hurt, the shutting up of the soul into a castle of selfishness, that doesn't always just go away. Ask a minister who's been caught in a public embarrassment. God forgives him, but the look in his wifes eyes, the way the church shuns him, that's still there.
Jimmy Swaggart has his own radio show again, not as big, but it's there.
Time was created for healing. There are certain wounds that only time can heal. And there is no wound that won't eventually be healed, either here or in the world to come. It's just a matter of time. Time for the ringing to die down, for the wound to cool. There are no shortcuts or magic elixirs for wounds of the heart, there is only time. No one can wound you forever (except, ironically, God) and sometimes nothing will make you feel any better.
Except Time.
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